Early AM madness..

~~~

4am and I am awoken by an itch…

Something managed to penetrate my protective barrier of blankies and happy pants and bit me on the leg.  So I scratch, as one does in these situations.

Half asleep, half awake, hundred percent annoyed with leg in the air, scratching gently as to not rip the skin.. my mind wanders.

'Those, my friend, are lug nuts. You know how allergic I am to nuts.'

I wonder which little critter bit me, I nod to myself,  luckily I am not allergic to anything.. followed by “that I know of”.. and from there on out it all went downhill.

Thoughts went wild and the convo in my head goes like this :

“What if I am allergic? Oh My! and then my throat closes up and everyone is still sleeping and I won’t be able to call for help!”

OMG!!!

“Calm down Briget, you are fine.. See, you are still breathing.”

 

“Then why is my heart beating so FAST!?”

 

“Because I am an asshole, panicking over nothing”

 

“oh”

 

“ja”

 

“So if I WAS allergic and went into an Anaphylaxis, what then? We have no shot thingies here.. if I wake up the husband – then what?   He can’t do anything but WATCH-ME-DIE ..”

 

“WATCH-ME-DIE….”

 

“No, I shall let him sleep.. no point in worrying him.”

 

“I am such a good wife, hope he remembers that after I am gone”

 

“Wonder if they will remember that I want to be cremated, buried bodies can turn into zombies.. and I am not keen on a diet of brains”

 

“uhm, why am I planning this?”

 

“I am such an asshole making myself panic like this”

 

“well, I hope this fucken insect that bit me and started all this madness dies a million deaths”

 

At this point, I stopped scratching and proceeded to Google ways on how to deal with insect allergies in an emergency without dying.

Turns out it might be a good idea that I wake him up, let him knock me unconscious which will buy us some extra time to get to the hospital, should the need arise. Not that it would, but you never know.

xoxo

brigetsignew