Going Nowhere…slowly

On my drive back home from EmPONGeni last night I made a decision… well it was more like a yearning but you hear me..

I wanted to just keep driving.. slowly.. with no destination except that I will just keep going. Discover new places, meet new people, learn new things.

A year is all I need (I hope) and in that time I want to have covered the expanse of South Africa before moving over the sea..

Now, this might not mean much to most people but if you know me your jaw will be hanging in shock because you realise just what a big deal this is for me. I don’t travel.. ever. Have never even been to slaapstad.. hardly left the KZN border, in fact.

Travel scares me mostly and as I am a person driven by fearful thoughts, contantly panicking over everything, you can see how change does not come easy for me. But here I am, just barely containing the urge to throw a few things in a bag and hitting the road, indefinitely.

It just feels right. As if this is what I have been looking for.. what is required in my journey of self discovery.

It may be due to the fact I settled down and did the kid/wife thing too early? Who knows!?!?!? Doesn’t really matter now anyway. What does matter now is that I need to not squash this feeling.. this urge.. I need to follow through, no matter what.

Questions running through my mind are :

• What about the kids?
• What about money?
• Will SexyG be coming with?
• Will my car survive the proposed trip?

I have no answers yet.. but I am working on it One thing I do know is that I plan to write while I travel.. I have several ideas and topics and just dying to write them down

Lets just hope this doesn’t take FOREVER To figure out because I think this could be just the thing I need to do in order to calm my mind to a slight panic.