If I had a penis..

…hhmmmm If I had a penis.. I would write my name in the dirt every chance I get.. If I had a penis.. I would never wear loose boxers because the thought of a dangly bits on my thighs offends me.. If I had a penis.. I would wax my tackle regularly.. No-one likes to go down on tumbleweed.. If I had a penis.. I would be hung like a horse.. this I know.. If I had a penis.. I wonder if I too would try sticking it in all sorts of things to see what happens?? If I had a penis.. I would miss my vagina.. If I had a penis.. I would show it to everyone who wanted to look.. If I had a penis.. I would talk to it every day to find out how it was hanging.. If I had a penis.. I would probably be such a slut.. If I had a penis.. I wouldn’t be phoning the girl in the...