Taking over the world..
I am convinced this is the way to go. If I am going to quieten the beast within I need to conquer this planet and dominate its inhabitants .. I suppose that the easier route would be to do it without warning and one day you wake up and see my face on the bank note instead of the rhino’s ass or mugabes lips.. but I think that if I am going to do it it will defninitely be very upfront and forward and no surprises and that will make embracing me so much easier.. (to know me is to love me, my mom said so.. I believe her). So the dilemma at the moment is which avenue should I take? Should I start up a political party advocating some controversial subject such as whether showering is the answer to all evils or not…?? Should I use my sexual prowess to...
Catsuits & Whips…
We ALL have that drawer, You know the one I’m talking about The one we dont let the kids or our parents see.. It contains all sorts of sexy lingerie, toys perhaps, magazines if you’re a boy, whips if you’re kinky,scarves if your adventurous and one or two outfits if you are playful … Bedroom play is important to every relationship .. There is definitely more to sex than the pummeling blindly forward in the dark keeping half your clothes on because its over most of the time before its begun. Now if your one of those typical guys who say “I have never got any complaints” ask yourself this.. How often is it initiated by your partner and how many compliments have you received? If you are sitting there now staring at the monitor...
My mom…
Wow, I find my life is so consumed with worry for my mom lately. She is ill right now and I feel so helpless. I wish i could make it all better but the reality of it is that I cant. I can only be there for her and transport her and look after her needs right now. Wish I had gone to Medical School instead of being a geek and taking computer courses. I can see it now. I would be the Meredith Grey pleading with Dr McDreamy to “Love Me!!, Pick Me!!” all the while maintaining puppy dog eyes and pursed lips and promising not to snore like a tractor… But real life is so different to tv programs. Instead I am at the mercy of the Surgical Doctor at the local hospital who is jaded with the amount of people he sees everyday and doesnt understand that my...
Penalties of “safe”..
I spent the best part of yesterday morning dealing with the two “liceheads” that live with me. They seem to be coming home with lice every second week and I am tired of it. Whats up with this epidemic? And yes I think its an epidemic of pandemic proportions! When I was in school if I had lice infest my tresses twice it was alot and I think my hair was so traumatised by the removal method by my Mother and her foulsmelling, eyeburning, scalpremoving concoctions, that it manufactured little antibody soldiers that took guard and cut down any wannabe intruders. I asked the pharmacist if they still sold that stuff cos I personally think that might be the way to go but he said it was not a safe product and was not being sold anymore. Safe? who cares about...
snap on…
Walked into the office this morning armed with my coffee and diary ready to tackle the day… Sat down and opened my mail program and watched the email come in automatically sorting itself into all the relevant folders. So there I was opening mail after mail when I suddenly got up and walked upstairs to the bathroom… Dropped my pants and looked in the mirror. I looked everywhere! I even called my boyfriend for a second opinion.. He walked away mumbling something about rehab… So what was I looking for? My Penis. I was looking for my penis. After receiving all the mail about penis enlargements and how I dont have to feel bad anymore and I can finally be a champ in bed with a penis enlargement, I felt it necessary to go and check if perhaps they...
Tracking..
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